11 Signs It's Time to Start Therapy (From a Holistic Therapist)
Maybe you've tried therapy before but didn't feel like it "worked." Or maybe you've been quietly wondering if therapy could actually help you with the heaviness, the ache, the confusion that comes with being human.
Therapy can help with so many things. Some of the most common reasons people seek support are anxiety, depression, trauma, and relationship distress; concerns that respond well to evidence-based approaches like CBT, IFS, EMDR, and Somatic Therapy (just to name a few). If you're struggling with any of these, reaching out is one of the bravest things you can do.
And... I'm here with a gentle reminder that therapy is also a healing space for the more subtle and existential struggles, the ones that cause quiet distress, slow burnout, and the sense that you're wading through a life that feels mediocre or unfulfilling.
Things like: high-functioning anxiety that's become your constant companion. Exhaustion that no amount of sleep can touch. The sense that you're going through the motions of a life that doesn't quite feel like yours. The quiet question you Googled at 2am: "Do I need therapy?"
As a holistic therapist with over a decade of experience, I've learned that the signs it's time for therapy include both the more obvious struggles and the subtler ones we tend to dismiss.
This list honors both.
11 Signs It's Time to Start Therapy
Here's something I wish more people knew: you don't have to "need" therapy to start therapy. You don't need to be in crisis. You don't need a "good enough" reason.
If any of these signs resonate, let that be enough to reach out for support.
11 signs it's time to start therapy:
Anxiety has become your baseline. You're so used to the quiet hum of worry and overwhelm that you barely notice it anymore.
You're exhausted in a way sleep doesn't fix. No matter how much you rest, you still feel depleted.
You've been feeling sad, hopeless, or numb for weeks. The heaviness isn't lifting on its own.
Your relationships feel draining or unfulfilling. Connection feels harder than it should.
You're going through the motions but not really living. Life feels like a checklist, not an adventure.
You keep repeating the same self-sabotaging patterns. Different situation, same outcome, and you're not sure why.
You've tried self-help (and AI!), but you've hit a ceiling. Books, meditation, AI therapy and podcasts only take you so far.
Something feels "off" but you can't name it. There's a quiet disconnection you can't quite explain. You know there’s “more” you want from life.
You're successful on paper but unfulfilled in your soul. You've checked the boxes, but something's still missing.
You're facing a major life transition. Change (even good change), can shake things up and feel destabilizing.
You're questioning your purpose or direction. The big questions are getting louder and harder to ignore.
→ Curious if therapy is right for you? Book a free consultation call to learn more about how holistic therapy can help.
1. Anxiety has become your baseline
You might not even call it anxiety anymore. It's just... how you are. The racing thoughts, the tightness in your chest, the way you're always bracing for the next thing. Your nervous system has been running on high alert for so long that constant vigilance feels normal.
But it's not, and you know it. You can feel your body, your heart, your spirit, asking for quiet, slowness, and support.
→ Learn more about therapy for anxiety
“You don’t have to ‘need’ therapy to start therapy.”
2. You're exhausted in a way sleep doesn't fix
This isn't about needing more rest. This is depletion at a deeper level, emotional, mental, and spiritual. You wake up tired. You push through the day. You collapse at night and do it all over again.
This kind of exhaustion often signals burnout or deep nervous system dysregulation. It's your whole system saying: I need more than a weekend off.
→ Learn more about therapy for your nervous system
3. You've been feeling sad, hopeless, or numb for weeks
Being human is a wild ride, and sadness is a part of it. But when the heaviness lingers, when weeks pass and the fog doesn't lift, it's worth paying attention to.
Your feelings are messengers. And therapy can help you understand what they're trying to tell you.
→ Learn more about therapy for depression
4. Your relationships feel draining or unfulfilling
Maybe you're giving more than you're receiving. Maybe you feel unseen, unheard, or like you're walking on eggshells. Maybe you've noticed you keep attracting the same kinds of dynamics.
Our relationships often mirror our inner world. Therapy can help you understand those patterns and create more fulfilling connections.
→ Learn more about therapy for relationships
5. You're going through the motions but not really living
You're doing all the things. Checking the boxes. Showing up. But there's an emptiness underneath, a sense that you're watching your life from a distance instead of actually living it.
You deserve a life that feels in alignment with your purpose and higher self. Therapy can help you tune in and reconnect with your spiritual side.
→ Learn more about spiritual therapy
6. You keep repeating the same patterns
Different job, same burnout. Different relationship, same heartbreak. You've noticed the pattern, but you can't seem to break it.
That's because these patterns often live below your conscious awareness—in the body, in old beliefs, in the parts you haven't fully met yet. Approaches like Internal Family Systems (IFS), Shadow Work, Spiritual Therapy and Somatic Therapy can help you understand and shift what talk alone can't reach.
→ Learn more about healing self-sabotage
7. You've tried self-help (and AI!), but you've hit a ceiling
You've read the books. Listened to the podcasts. Started a meditation practice. Done the journaling. Maybe you’ve even started using AI for ‘therapy’. And it’s helping…you think.
But some healing requires more than insight and information. It requires another nervous system. A witness. A safe space where you can be seen in your wholeness and supported as you grow.
Therapy offers something self-help practice and AI can't: the transformative power of being truly seen and supported by another person.
→ Read: Can AI Replace Therapy?
“Some healing requires more than insight and information. It requires another nervous system. A witness. A safe space where you can be seen in your wholeness and supported as you grow.”
8. Something feels "off" but you can't name it
You can't point to a specific problem. Nothing is terribly wrong. And yet... something doesn't feel right. There's a quiet disconnection, a sense that you've drifted away from your true self.
Sometimes the soul knows before the mind has words. Therapy can help you listen.
→ Learn more about shadow work
9. You're successful on paper but still feel unfulfilled
You've achieved all the things you were supposed to achieve. Career, relationship, lifestyle, it all looks good from the outside. But inside, there's a whisper: Is this really it?
External success without internal alignment creates its own kind of suffering. You're allowed to want more than a life that just looks good. You're allowed to want one that feels meaningful.
→ Learn more about existential therapy
10. You're facing a major life transition
A new career. A divorce. A move. Becoming a parent. Losing someone you love. Even the transitions you choose can shake you up and call for a deep recalibration.
Change doesn't just happen to you, it changes you. Therapy can help you navigate life transitions with intention, so you can rebuild in alignment with who you're becoming.
→ Learn more about holistic therapy
11. You're questioning your purpose or direction
The big questions are getting louder. What am I here for? What actually matters to me? Is this the life I want?
These questions are invitations. An opening to reconnect with lost or abandoned parts of yourself. Therapy can help you explore them, not to find easy answers, but to live more deeply into the questions themselves.
→ Learn more about IFS therapy
How to Know if You’re Ready for Therapy
“Therapy is a practice of deep self-inquiry and intentional self-care. A space to tend to your mind, body, heart, and soul.”
If reading this list stirred something in you, that's inner wisdom worth listening to.
You don't need to have all 11 signs. You don't need to be in a crisis. You don’t need to be suffering more than everyone else to get help. Recognizing yourself in even one of these signs is enough of a reason to reach out.
Take a breath. Place a hand on your heart. And ask yourself: What would it feel like to let myself be supported?
→ If you’re ready to take the next step, book a free consultation call to learn about working with one of our therapists.
How We Approach Therapy at The Holistic Counseling Center
At The Holistic Counseling Center, we offer therapy that honors the mind-body-spirit connection. We integrate evidence-based approaches like Internal Family Systems (IFS), Somatic Therapy, EMDR, Brainspotting, and CBT with nervous system regulation tools and psychospiritual practices like mindfulness, breathwork, and spiritual exploration.
We're not here to "fix" you. We're here to help you understand the root causes of your struggles, reconnect with your inner wisdom, and create lasting transformation—in your mind, your body, and your life.
Whether you're navigating anxiety, depression, relationship challenges, burnout, or simply a sense that there must be more, we're here to meet you where you are.
Ready to Explore If Therapy Is Right for You?
If any of these signs resonated, we'd love to support you. At The Holistic Counseling Center, we offer both in-person and online therapy in California with clinicians who truly integrate mind, body, and spirit.
Taking the first step is simple:
Schedule a Free Consultation Call — We'll learn about what's bringing you to therapy and answer your questions.
Get Matched With a Therapist — We'll connect you with a clinician who feels like a great fit for you. You can also speak directly with your recommended therapist before having a session.
Begin Your Journey — Start working toward the clarity, peace, and fulfillment you're seeking.
We currently offer in-person therapy in San Francisco, San Anselmo (Marin County), Berkeley, El Dorado Hills, San Clemente, and online throughout California.
Takeaway
Seeking therapy doesn’t mean you're broken. It means you’re human, struggling, and brave enough to reach out for support.
If you recognized yourself in any of these signs, trust that knowing. You don't need to wait until things get worse. And you don't need a "good enough" reason.
Your wellbeing is reason enough. So let yourself be supported.
Book a Free Consultation Call →
About the Author
Kim Burris, LMFT is a licensed holistic psychotherapist, founder of The Holistic Counseling Center, Adjunct professor at CIIS and author of ‘The First 90 Days After Birth.’
Her work has been featured in Vogue, Bustle, and the Daily Om.
Kim honors the mind-body-spirit connection and offers evidence-based psychotherapy with a heart-centered approach that helps people find relief from anxiety and self-sabotage so they can live life with more joy, freedom, and ease.
Kim and her team offer holistic counseling throughout California—in San Francisco, San Anselmo, Berkeley, El Dorado Hills, San Clemente, and online. Book a free consultation call to get started.
Disclaimer: This content is for informational purposes only and is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician or qualified mental health professional.
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